Asking is the most important discipline in life. Think about it – what have you ever gotten without asking? Be honest with yourself – it’s minimal. There are always exceptions, but it’s not the norm. You must ask for what you want: directly, assumptively, assertively, and repeatedly. Asking opens the world to you and unlocks all things possible. Asking is everything – that’s where it all starts. Never be afraid of NO.

When you fail to ask, you fail.

Think about it – for so many, asking is the most difficult thing to do. We squirm, we beat around the proverbial bush, phrase it differently (instead of directly), we can be wishy-washy, we are uncomfortable, timid, and it can be emotional… so we hesitate, using weak and passive words – always afraid of the NO. How bad can it be? No is a word – take it that way, think of it that way. Brush yourself off and reset. That’s it. Passive doesn’t work, insecurity doesn’t play out well. Wishing, hoping, and wanting is not a viable strategy. Asking with confidence is one of the most difficult things for humans to do. We feel it places us in a vulnerable spot if we receive the wrong response – you are taking an emotional risk and that makes many of us very uncomfortable. When you ask, you make yourself instantly vulnerable, with no place to hide. Vulnerability is created in the presence of uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure. This vulnerability opens us up to one of deepest and darkest human fears: rejection.

Why are we so uncomfortable in asking?

“Asking is the beginning of receiving.”
-Jim Rhon

“Nothing will ever be attempted if all possible objections must first be overcome.”
-Samuel Johnson

“Believe and act as if it were impossible to fail.”
-Charles Kettering

To get what you want, you must ask for what you want. Remember rule number one; if you haven’t been told no three times, it doesn’t count! The first no doesn’t always mean no. It can be a knee-jerk response, a response not well thought out – possibly not considering all the facts and reasoning behind the initial no. You have not failed, ask again – the first no is just the beginning of the journey. You must control your emotions and ask again, assumptively, and assertively, for what you want or to make your point.

“Never, never, never, give up.”
-Winston Churchill

“Life is a school of probability.”
-Walter Bagehot

“If you don’t ask, you don’t get.”
-Stevie Wonder

… and Yes, it’s possible!